Things I do all the time that I probably shouldn’t do because I am a world leader.
- When people say they like something of mine and I say “Thanks! I think it is so ugly!”. For exampy I recently misplaced/lost my fab ray bans major tradge I know. Anywho, so I went to the mecca of all meccas, Target and bought myself a pair of cheapy wayfarers that would work until I hired a detective to find my Ray Bans. Well fool me once target, the TORTISE SHELL sunglasses I had bought at the store, were really a plaid/tartan pattern. So either one of two things happened, the bastards at Target were playing a cruel trick on me and sold me pattern changing sunglasses. Or I made a mistake and wasn’t paying attention (We all know this isn’t even really a possibility because I am perfect and make no mistakes because I make the rules on this side of the solar system). I have NEVER been more mad at Target in my life. Who would even create such a dumb pattern for a pair of sunglasses. Like do people just sit there and go, oh wow let me buy these tartan patterned sunglasses to match my kilt… WHAT THE EFF TARGET. Like wow excuse me for thinking that the sunglasses I picked up were the 3rd most popular color/pattern for sunglasses, and then you use your engineers and scientists to change the pattern and play a cruel trick on me? I have NEVER felt more betrayed, I have never even looked at a Walmart! Anyways. Back to the story, so I had nothing else to protect my delicate eyes with near perfect vision from the beastly sun, so I was forced to commit social suey and wear the plaid sunglasses. Then here comes the mystical part… SOMEONE SAID THEY LIKED THEM! To which I responded really? Thanks! I hate them I didn’t mean to get these hideous things. Which to me sounds like I am insulting the other persons taste, although if they really thought the tartan sunglasses were cute, they deserve that treatment. Anyways the leader of the solar system (myself) can’t go around insulting the earthlings.
- Hate on Taylor Swift as much… One day when you see my name in lights, I don’t want half of Hollywood against me because I make fun of Swifty. It’s not my fault, it’s their thought. They have been brainwashed because they are weak and they can’t see the wolf under all that sheep’s clothing. I am never going to get over Taylor using a fake amish man in her Grammys performance to make herself look cooler and prettier, it was rude, distasteful and a bit racist. Can you be racist against the amish? Idk but you can now thanks to Taylor Swift.
- Secretly take pictures of the amish on my blackberry. It steals their soul, but I love knowing that I have the amish souls on my sim card.
- Do the crucio curse on so many people in my head. Have of you I have probably already crucioed because at one time or another I hated you for 5 seconds or longer.
- Murder people on Sims 3. It isn’t a healthy habit, I just love having power.
- Whispering into the ears of babies and dogs if they know the secret to life. While I know they know, and one day I will get an answer, it is creepy and weird.
- Stealing hot sauce from Chipotle. JUST KIDDING, CAN’T STOP, WON’T STOP.
- Trying to play cool music when my friends are around… I need to just be myself, if I want to listen to Hannah Montana, Gosh darnit, I am going to listen to Hannah Montana. Don’t need to pretend to be someone I am not, I don’t know who Skullrex or avici is and I don’t want to know.
Ow okay so my accident I just jammed something into my gums and I am experiencing great pain, I must use a healing charm on myself immediately.
Let’s get on to the next topic, Lent! As the wannabe devout catholic/god fearing woman that I am, I take Lent very seriously especially going to church on easter (if you don’t go to church on Easter you go to hades). Anywho, my options for what to give up at lent are limited, not giving up facebook, hot sauce, alcohol, chipotle etc. The things I truly love I cannot give up. SO I am going to strive to be a better person and tell one person one nice thing about them a day.
Today’s person is……. hold on let me go on facebook and I will pick the first person who makes a status. SARAH DOLLARTON! Sarah, you are a lovely person, a great sister and a great friend. You make very good tacos and are very nice for inviting me to dinner all tha time. You also sing very well. I appreciated you urging me to clean my trunk, the task of which I completed last week. You can lay in my trunk any day and you can sing in it as well.
LOVE AND LIGHT PEOPLE LOVE AND LIGHT.
ALSO WAIT. GOT A CAT! She goes by several names, schnookums, Ponce De Leon, Whitney Mewston/Meowston, Ponce De Leon Meowston the 3rd… etc.
Okay now I am done. Byez.